In the modern plugged in world of social media, we\u2019ve got countless dating apps at our fingertips. These handy dandy tools give us the ability to connect with thousands, even millions of people with just a few quick clicks.<\/p>\n
As overwhelming as that may be, what a cool opportunity to be able to form community, and even romantic relationships.<\/p>\n
Especially amids the COVID-19 pandemic, when the norms around meeting new people have changed, and in-person opportunities are limited.<\/p>\n
But it can be tricky understanding how to navigate online dating. Because as much as it can feel like a game on your phone, you\u2019re dealing with people\u2019s hearts, specifically your own.<\/p>\n
Your friends at Intimina are here to give you some tips, tricks, and guidance on being authentic when online dating.<\/p>\n
First off, there\u2019s nothing to be ashamed of.<\/p>\n
Although this may not apply to you, it\u2019s good to get it out in the open because online dating can come with a lot of stigma. I hear it all the time when talking to friends. Things like \u201cThis is my first time\u201d<\/em>, \u201cI know it\u2019s weird but\u2026\u201d<\/em>, or \u201cI\u2019m going to lie about where we met\u201d<\/em>.<\/p>\n While this is perfectly understandable, online dating is an incredible tool to help us meet one of our most basic needs – human connection.<\/p>\n So why not use what you\u2019ve got?!<\/p>\n Do we have to say it again? These are people\u2019s hearts, including your own. You\u2019re not doing anyone any favors by playing games or being manipulative.<\/p>\n When talking to someone new, check in with yourself and how you\u2019re communicating. Is this the angle you want to be coming at a relationship with? Are you being true to yourself? Are you being fair to this other person? Do you have ulterior motives for talking to this person?<\/p>\n Because if you want to have an authentic online dating experience, you need to drop any and all of that.<\/p>\n What Do You Want?<\/p>\n When starting to online date, examine in yourself what you\u2019re looking for. A hookup buddy? Platonic friends? Casual dating? A long term partner? A threesome? A polyamorous situation?<\/p>\n There\u2019s a lot of options, and it\u2019s incredibly helpful to you and whoever you\u2019re chatting with to be clear about what you\u2019re both looking for.<\/p>\n Having said that, it\u2019s ok to not know what you want out of a situation – but be sure to communicate that. It\u2019s as simple as \u201cHey! I\u2019m really enjoying getting to know you, I just want to let you know that I\u2019m not quite sure what I\u2019m looking for, but I\u2019d love to continue talking and seeing what happens. What about you?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n The cool thing about online dating is that you get to flex your flirting skills with multiple people at once, and are able to hone in on what sort of dialogues get you excited when talking to a new person.<\/p>\n Even if you tend to be shy, you literally have nothing to lose by just being your (really awesome) self. Push yourself to be as communicative as possible.<\/p>\n Of course you\u2019ll want to learn the basics about someone\u2019s life like where they\u2019re from, what they do, and what their passions and hobbies are. Try phrasing these questions in a way that gets you both excited.<\/p>\n Instead of \u201cWhat hobbies are you interested in?\u201d<\/em>, try \u201cWhat passions light you up?\u201d<\/em>. You can use fun icebreaker questions like \u201cWhat\u2019s your dream sandwich?\u201d<\/em> or \u201cIf you could go on any adventure right now, what would it be?\u201d<\/em>.<\/p>\n When you put effort into conversations, you\u2019ll know right away if someone\u2019s worth your time, by how much effort they give back.<\/p>\n You\u2019ll also want to ask about topics that are really important to you. Are there any potential deal breakers that would disqualify someone from the running? That could be their views on marriage, kids, politics, social justice, or general views on life.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re not familiar with the term scarcity mentality, it\u2019s time you learn. Scarcity mentality is the belief or fear that there won\u2019t be enough. In terms of dating, this looks like dating someone that you know isn\u2019t the right fit for you, out of fear you won\u2019t find someone else.<\/p>\n If you\u2019re feeling hesitation, go with that. Don\u2019t be afraid of saying no and breaking things off, I promise you there are plenty more fish in the sea.<\/p>\n Your intuition knows.<\/p>\n As impersonal as screens can be, your intuition will still speak to you, letting you know if someone is wrong or right.<\/p>\n Notice if talking to someone triggers you in any way. You may experience actual physical sensations in your body, like your gut or heart, telling you this isn\u2019t right.<\/p>\n Or that it absolutely is right!<\/p>\n Last, but certainly not least…be gentle with your sweet self.<\/p>\n Online dating can come with what seems like a lot of rejection. But know that any perceived \u201crejection\u201d, just wasn\u2019t the right person for you.<\/p>\n It can be exhausting. If you feel yourself getting burnt out, or using online dating as a crutch, be sure to take a break, and even delete the apps for a period of time. You can try setting time limits on them as well, so it doesn\u2019t feel you\u2019re binging on swiping.<\/p>\n Finding love doesn\u2019t always feel easy, so remember to stay open to opportunities, and be true to yourself. Once you find a new sweetie, it\u2019s time to build your dream distance date!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In the modern plugged in world of social media, we\u2019ve got countless dating apps at our fingertips. These handy dandy tools give us the ability to connect with thousands, even…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":18386,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nBut Also- Don\u2019t Play Games<\/h2>\n
What Do We Talk About?<\/h2>\n
Know When to Move Along<\/h2>\n
Trust Your Gut<\/h2>\n
Be Gentle With Yourself<\/h2>\n