{"id":21855,"date":"2023-12-13T13:16:31","date_gmt":"2023-12-13T12:16:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/?p=21855"},"modified":"2024-09-25T08:17:11","modified_gmt":"2024-09-25T06:17:11","slug":"reproductive-trauma-tips","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Overcome Reproductive Trauma"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Today, we\u2019ll be discussing a very sensitive topic. That is, reproductive trauma.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And while it can be difficult to talk about, it is definitely something that needs to be discussed in general.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To start a global conversation with the right support is the goal. But this may be thinking big.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That is why, with the resources we have, we would love to approach the topic.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">With many individuals facing unbearable pain because of it, both physical and <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">psychological<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, we hope to offer comfort in the form of tools that may help you to deal with this kind of trauma.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What Is Reproductive Trauma?\u00a0<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The term \u2018reproductive trauma\u2019 may seem slightly vague.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And the way in which we\u2019ll talk about this very sensitive subject is in such a way that it covers any form of loss that involves the process of <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">becoming a parent<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Some examples of reproductive trauma include, but are not limited to:<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/how-to-discuss-infertility-with-people\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Infertility<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stillbirth<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/is-it-normal-to-experience-grief-after-an-abortion\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Abortion<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/pregnancy-complications-placenta-previa\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pregnancy complications<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/understanding-miscarriage\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Miscarriages<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Complicated deliveries<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/postpartum-depression-study\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Postpartum depression<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In other words, reproductive trauma is a spectrum. And everyone who experiences it will have a unique experience that often encompasses grief and feelings of pain.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reproductive Trauma: A Gateway To Other Forms of Pain<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the realm of reproductive trauma, it is possible for the trauma itself to give way to another form of heartache and pain. One that is not related to their reproductive trauma.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, if someone has experienced a miscarriage they could also be dealing with the pain associated with not becoming a parent.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They may have mentally prepared to have a child and\/or created a special space in their home for their unborn child\u2014all of which can result in the shattering of a dream. This makes this kind of trauma extremely difficult and complex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Having said that, there are ways to work through the trauma.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Reproductive Trauma: A Qualitative Study\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At the end of 2022 two researchers, Clay and Marjorie Brigance, conducted <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.tandfonline.com\/doi\/abs\/10.1080\/15332691.2022.2142716?journalCode=wcrt20\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">a study<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> while they were experiencing reproductive trauma first-hand (infertility followed by a complicated pregnancy).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The study was designed as a duoethnography, which is a collaborative research method where the researchers themselves are the test subjects.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this case the two researchers, who are a couple, used open dialogue as a means to compare and contrast their experience as well as tools such as listening, interrogation, and questioning themselves and their partner.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Throughout the study they documented their trials and tribulations through in-depth conversations and journaling. What they found was that the experience of reproductive trauma is ambiguous, making it hard to actually grieve.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cWhen a physical death occurs, we have rituals to process this loss. However, there is no ritual with the grief of infertility or early pregnancy loss. We often suffer in silence,\u201d <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">says the research couple.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Their biggest takeaway from their study was that it\u2019s important to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/talk-about-intimate-health\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">talk about it<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, so that it is no longer a scary secret. That, and how crucial it is to really sit with the feelings without trying to fix them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cThe more we can talk about it, the more we can normalize it,\u201d <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">says the researchers.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Results: Trauma &amp; Attachment Styles\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At the end of the study, the couple had some interesting findings.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">They found that their unprocessed trauma led to decreased empathy, which brought about an avoidant-insecure attachment style.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This kind of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/how-do-you-approach-relationships\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">attachment style<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is when, instead of craving intimacy, a person will be wary of closeness with another and they will try to avoid emotional connections. Instead, they would rather rely on themselves during their time of pain.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Additionally, they found that when they <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">did<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> process their trauma by having empathetic communication and spiritual connection, their attachment style was more secure couple attachment.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This attachment style is made up of a person appreciating their own self-worth and their ability to be themselves in a relationship. They also actively seek support and comfort from their partner, and are happy for their partner to do the same.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">With these results, the researchers were able to summarize their findings into three different ways in which people could overcome reproductive trauma.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">3 Ways To Help Overcome Reproductive Trauma<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><b>If you, or someone you know, is experiencing reproductive trauma, these three pieces of advice may be helpful:\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">1. Realizing that you are not alone<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As mentioned above, dealing with reproductive trauma can be difficult because it can be ambiguous. It\u2019s hard to accept or work through trauma when you don\u2019t know how to do it, and it can feel extremely isolating.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But, it\u2019s in these times that you should remind yourself that you\u2019re not alone. The more you talk about it, the more solace and grieving you can experience.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For this, it\u2019ll prove invaluable for you to find a community or person(s) who truly understands you and can empathize.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">2. Sit with the emotions, don\u2019t try to \u201cfix\u201d them<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the study, it was found that when one partner validated the other\u2019s feelings, it was more effective than trying to \u201cfix\u201d or \u201csolve\u201d them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to experience relational closeness, it means sitting with the pain,&#8221;<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> says Brigance. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This could come in a comment like, \u2018This is just so hard. I see your hurt.\u2019\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">3. Don\u2019t let outside opinions get to you or sway how you\u2019re feeling<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s natural for people to want to give you advice or guidance. But just because everyone has an opinion doesn\u2019t mean that they are true or valid.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you choose to listen to outside advice, remember that not all of it will be helpful. Everyone is allowed to have thoughts and feelings on parenthood, but it is only you who knows what your trauma feels like.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In times like these, leaning on your partner or a mental health professional may be the best thing to do as you grieve.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are going through reproductive trauma, we hope that these tips and information have helped you in some way.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talking through your pain however, as opposed to trying to fix it, could just be the best way to deal with your grief (and if you have one, become closer to your partner). You are not alone, and your feelings are valid.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing) therapy has been shown in several studies to help deal with a variety of negative emotions. For more information, check out &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.emdrandcounselingcenter.com\/what-to-expect-emdr\">What To Expect in EMDR<\/a>&#8220;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today, we\u2019ll be discussing a very sensitive topic. That is, reproductive trauma. And while it can be difficult to talk about, it is definitely something that needs to be discussed&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":39,"featured_media":21555,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false},"categories":[4],"tags":[93,211,243,358],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.12 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How To Process Grief of Reproductive Trauma<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Three tips to help you cope with the physical and mental effects associated with reproductive trauma. You are not alone.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Helena Lorimer\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Helena Lorimer\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/fc13d97f2aa5ad994cb4b084b52aaf7d\"},\"headline\":\"How To Overcome Reproductive Trauma\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-12-13T12:16:31+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2024-09-25T06:17:11+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/\"},\"wordCount\":1076,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"sex\",\"sexual health\",\"sexual wellness\",\"sex life\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Sexual Wellness\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/reproductive-trauma-tips\/\",\"name\":\"How To Process Grief of Reproductive Trauma\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.intimina.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2023-12-13T12:16:31+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2024-09-25T06:17:11+00:00\",\"description\":\"Three tips to help you cope with the physical and mental effects associated with reproductive trauma. 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