Everything You Need To Know About Phone Sex

Looking for a new way to spice up your sex life? Pick up the phone.

Phone sex isn’t just relegated to old movies or long-distance relationships, it’s also a great way to test out role-playing, explore your auditory sensuality, and add suspense and excitement in your relationships. Experimenting helps you learn more about yourself and strengthen the mind-body connection.

Read on to learn more about phone sex, how it can benefit your sex life, and some tips for steamy lip service.

What Is Phone Sex, Exactly?

Phone sex is a blanket term referring to the act of engaging in, discussing, or hearing sexual fantasies or acts auditorily. In today’s era of smartphones, you can also include videocalls as well as texting or voice messages (aka sexting) under the phone sex umbrella.

Essentially, phone sex is when you’re sharing anything erotic over the phone, and just like in-person sex, doesn’t necessarily have to culminate in an orgasm. Oftentimes, phone sex only involves one person physically pleasuring themselves, while the other builds connection and mental stimulation. Engaging in this type of partner play can be highly erotic and validating even if there isn’t a physical climax. 

Benefits Of Phone Sex

Adds suspense and excitement in a relationship

Whether you just started dating or are looking for ways to spice things up in a long-term relationship, phone sex can be a great way to build suspense and add excitement.

For example, if you have a date later in the day, or if you and your partner are busy working all day and can’t see each other until the evening, start building up tension by teasing your partner with sexy calls, texts, or photos throughout the day. It’ll keep you on their mind and build excitement for both of you leading up to the physical encounter.

You can also schedule a phone sex date and employ these methods to add tension. Mystery, tension, and suspense all add to eroticism, because sexiness is all about imagination.

Keeps the spark alive for long-distance relationships

For people in long-distance relationships, it can be difficult to maintain a sense of physical intimacy. Getting creative with phone sex and talking about what you want to do when you finally see each other can keep you in each other’s minds and keep the spark alive.

A way to test out role-playing

Role-playing can be intimidating, especially if you haven’t done it before. Phone sex is a great way to try things out that you aren’t as comfortable doing in person, at least not yet, and act as a gateway to roleplay without physically dressing up.

Get creative over the phone with a sexy “dominant” voice or high-pitched “schoolgirl” tone. You can also keep the natural seductiveness of your voice, make up a sexy scenario or fantasy, and let your imagination do the talking. 

Tips For The Hottest Phone Sex

Scheduling sexy time

Some people may think that marking “phone sex” into their calendar is the opposite of sexy, but it can be a good way to start.

While it’s great to be spontaneous and flow naturally, it can be difficult to know if the other person is also in the mood. It’s hard to pick up signals and context over the phone since you can’t see the person. Plus, planning it out ahead of time adds anticipation into the mix, increasing the excitement leading up to the call.

Incorporate some inspiration

Seek inspiration by scrolling through some porn, or revisit sexy photos and videos of your partner if you have any. Describing a scenario you can already picture in your mind is a lot easier than trying to make something up on the spot. Another option is to read erotic literature and branch off one of the scenarios you find arousing.

Don’t be afraid to use toys

Toys aren’t just a good way to help physically pleasure yourself during phone sex, but also a great way to spark some sexy conversation. For example, if you’re using a vibrator, tell your partner exactly how you’re using it, where you’re putting it, and how it feels.

You can also have your partner tell you exactly what to do with the toy (or vice versa) so that there’s an additional layer of connection and BDSM play.  

Have fun!

Don’t take yourself too seriously, relax, and have fun. Since phone sex is mostly an auditory format, it opens unique avenues of mental exploration and stimulates the most powerful erotic tool: The imagination.

Phone sex, like our imaginations, can get a little weird, so laugh it off if things get awkward! Laughing together helps with bonding and trust, so even if your partner says something that makes you giggle or you think you’re being silly, it’s still a good time.