The Holy Grail: Blended Orgasms
The C and the G.
Spots that is.
C spot and G spot.
When stimulated simultaneously this tantalizing combination is often called a “blended orgasm”. Aka, the holy grail of orgasms.
First off, I’d like to debunk the holy grail sentiment. For some blended orgasms may be just that, but we all have different needs, desires, and responses to different kinds of stimulation. The holy grail of orgasms is any kind that takes you above and beyond. That allows you to feel the wide depths of pleasure you’re capable of.
That’s a holy grail.
Having said that, there’s nothing quite like the feeling of when you (or someone else) hits the spot juuust right, and then they hit another spot. And that combination gets you spiraling in a swirl of ecstasy.
So let’s talk about blended orgasms. What exactly does that mean? How can I talk to my partner about having them? And most importantly – how on earth do I have one?
One Size Does Not Fit All
First things first – there are different kinds of blended orgasms.
While for the most part, people have similar erogenous zones, we’re all different, and we all have our quirks and preferences.
When figuring out what kind of blended orgasms you want to explore, think about what areas of your body you find the most pleasurable when stimulated.
The most commonly referenced blended orgasm is the clitoris and G spot. When you move further up the vagina, you can stimulate the A spot, and even the cervix.
Again, blended orgasms doesn’t just have to mean vaginal penteration and clitorial stimulation. People orgasm from having their nipples rubbed while being penetrated. Or their clitoris and anal penetration. Or no penetration at all, with multiple kinds of external stimulation.
You get the picture.
To Each Their Own
We’re all about redefining sexual standards, so from here on out, let’s say that a blended orgasm can simply mean climax, or reaching a heightened sexual state, from stimulating multiple areas of the body simultaneously.
On that note. There’s no hierarchy of orgasms. While one kind may feel better than another to you, ranking orgasms is problematic and unnecessary. This is your sex life, find what works best for you.
Keep in mind that if while exploring blended orgasms, it feels too intense for you, there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s ok for something to simply not feel good. If you are experiencing pain, that may be something to explore with a professional, like a sexological bodyworker.
What Does it Feel Like?
For one, it’s going to feel different for everyone.
Some people experience a quick rise and fall, like with a clitoral orgasm. Others may have a sense of all over euphoria. You may feel a deep rumble starting in your pelvis that ripples out to the bottom of your toes and the ends of your hair. Yum.
It also entirely depends on what areas of your body are being stimulated, and how you’re feeling in your body overall on any given day.
Do it Yourself
How you “do it” depends on just what kind of orgasm you’re going for.
It can be helpful to start off with a position or trick that you know gets you off, and before you’re too close to going over the orgasm edge, incorporate something new into it.
If you’re used to cumming from laying on your back and rubbing your clit, great, try that. Once you get into a deeper state of arousal, try inserting a penis, toy, finger, etc, and stimulating different areas of your vagina. This will give your mind the alert, that “hey, maybe there are different ways to orgasm.”
The more you practice this, the more you’ll feel the unique sensations coming from different parts of your body, and what those feel like when they come together.
Whether you’re having solo sex, or with a partner, blended orgasms is an awesome time to incorporate any toys you may have on hand (or get a new one).
Strap ons and handheld dildos, vibrators, handheld devices, cock rings, butt plugs – you name it!
Toys are an awesome way to stimulate multiple areas of the body without the risk of hand cramping. They also allow you to explore saucy new positions, while keeping the sensation going on parts you want to keep stimulating.
Speaking of positions, here are some blended orgasm wow-a-wee ones to try.
- Cowgirl: Sit on your partner facing them. While you ride their penis or dildo (this position gives you control of the depth), they can reach around and play with anal fingering. At the same time, you can stimulate your clitoris with your fingers or a toy. Triple whammy!
- Doggy Style: Spice up this classic by having your partner reach around and stimulate your clitoris while they’re inside of you. You can do the same by reaching for their balls or clitoris and offering the same sort of diverse stimulation.
- Going Down: While your partner gives you some oral sex loving, have them play with a dildo, finger, or butt plug for some oral/anal mind-blowing action.
Talk it Out
As with anything, talk to your partner, or yourself, beforehand and have a game plan about what you want to explore that day. Once you become more comfortable or well versed in blended orgasms, your body may begin to tell you what you need in the moment.
As fun as it is to talk about different kinds of orgasms, the conversation can easily become goal-oriented, and discourage people who may have a more difficult time reaching that state.
It can be helpful to learn how to move the focus away from orgasms, and simply focus on connection and exploration.
That’s where the magic happens.
Natasha (she/her) is a full-spectrum doula and health+wellness copywriter. Her work focuses on deconstructing the shame, stigma, and barriers people carry around birth, sex, health, and beyond, to help people navigate through their lives with more education and empowerment. You can connect with Natasha on IG @natasha.s.weiss.